Helping
People Get from Here to There
Last night I attended the second week of a Support Group session with
a couple of friends, one of whose husband’s just passed away at
the end of April. The other two of us have been going as support for her,
but also to learn some things about grief and loss for ourselves.
Contact Information:
phone:
517-202-0553
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What dawned on
me last night was how closely related the grief process is to any kind
of change. Don’t get me wrong, grief is very emotional. But for
some people, the loss of a job, a spouse, moving, change in financial
status, any of those kind of changes cause a certain amount of anxiety
for people.
I remember years ago, when the bank that I worked for was going through
a merger. We were told 1) that it was a merger of equals (RIGHT!) and
2) that the two banks were so similar that it would be an easy, transparent
transition. The only thing that these two organizations had in common
was that they were both banks! Anyway, at the time we provided some change
management training and one of the processes that we discussed was the
five steps of change according to Kubler-Ross. These five steps are the
same five steps for dealing with grief.
- Denial (this isn't happening to me!)
- Anger (why is this happening to me?)
- Bargaining (I promise I'll be a better person if...)
- Depression (I don't care anymore)
- Acceptance (I'm ready for whatever comes)
A lesser known definition of the stages of grief is described by Dr. Roberta Temes in the book, "Living With An Empty Chair - a guide through grief." Temes describes three particular types of behavior exhibited by those suffering from grief and loss. They are:
- Numbness (mechanical functioning and social insulation)
- Disorganization (intensely painful feelings of loss)
- Reorganization (re-entry into a more "normal" social life)
Either set of behaviors probably have resonated for you at one time or another during your life. Or you may even be working through one of the stages at this moment. It isn't always easy to get through these stages alone. Some people may choose to join a support group, some may find the help of a therapist most beneficial and as you are looking to move forward in any aspect of your life (health, career, financial, relationships, etc.), a coach may be the answer. Click here for a complimentary session.
"Helping people get from here to there" is what I like to do.
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Jo Anne's Journey - 2009
August 3 - Douglas J Golf Outing for JDRF (Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation)
August 7 and 8 - Lansing JazzFest
August 5, 12, 19 and 26 - Playmakers Injury Clinic
6:00 p.m. – 8:00 p.m.
September 18 and 19 – Old Town BluesFest
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Sports Spouses - The Challenge of Being a Coach's Wife
Being a coach’s wife takes a special person. You automatically become the CEO of your household and family. You are the “glue” that holds it all together. When it’s time to move, you make all the arrangements. When it comes to dealing with the kids issues at school, you deal with the teachers. When it comes to soothing your spouse’s bruised ego after a loss, you’re the one who’s there for them.
When recently working with a group of coaches’ wives and asking the top three to five challenges of being a coach’s wife, the number one reason was loneliness followed by work/life balance, limited family time, lack of communication and dealing with change. Sound familiar?
Being a coach’s wife may be fulfilling enough for some women, but not for others. That certainly doesn’t mean that they don’t love their husbands or that they’re not supportive. It may just mean that they also need to be fulfilled as a person themselves. By working with a coach, women would have an opportunity to find out what it is that fulfills them. In addition, they can share experiences and build camaraderie.
Coaching is an opportunity for the wives to identify their own goals and issues, develop a plan for obtaining them and be held accountable.
For more information, log on to www.riseandshinetoday.com (Group Coaching) or contact Jo Anne Froelich, Personal and Professional Coach at 517-202-0553.
Rise and Shine Today monthly newsletter - october 2009
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